Steering Around Holiday Potholes

"The game of life is a game of boomerangs. Our thoughts ,deeds, and words return to us sooner or later with astounding accuracy." Florence Scovel Shinn

Holidays remind us of past memories, which can be both good and bad. Keep the present holidays central, and be thankful to  share it with people you love. Each holiday is unique. It is not possible or necessary to repeat a holiday experience. Embrace each holiday with a renewed spirit. Be fair when dividing your Holiday time between families. It might not be possible to spend your holidays with your children. Share memories throughout the year with those you care about and forget what the calendar says. A vacation spent with the grandchildren is just as wonderful as a Holiday time gathering. This quiet time over the summer may be more enjoyable and have less stress. Everything and everybody changes. We can always hope for the best in these changes. Change avoids stagnation. Attempt to keep some traditions but be accepting of the new traditions. Happy, positive outlooks add to the mood of a holiday get-together. Nix the negative and promote the positive. You will always be a sought after member of the family.

"Each of us will one day be judged by our standard of life, not by our standard of living; by our measure of giving, not by our measure of wealth; by our simple goodness, not by our seeming greatness." William Arthur Ward

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Always Question Assumptions

When viewing an issue from another perspective, we are given the opportunity to assimilate that viewpoint, and accommodate it through the eyes of our own experience. Each individual's circumstance is distinct. Each situation is likely to be distinct in certain circumstances, yet universal in other respects. More reflection leads to questioning assumptions. The Mother-in-Law Daughter-In-Law is a universal dilemma. It is an unintentionally significant relationship. It requires patience time effort and reflection. Jealousies need to be set aside. Control must be loosened and dropped altogether. judgments have to be rescinded. Compromise and tolerance is necessary. The relationship can be an evolving dream or nightmare. It really is up to the two women involved. Husband must refrain from involving their mothers in discussions and arguments. The  girl's mother must refrain from dumping guilt on her daughter every time she spends a happy time with her Mother-in-Law. Mothers-in-law should provide  space, acceptance of the amount of time she receives, and she must give her son wings to fly in his own direction, making his own decisions. His wife's mother must really do the same. Jealousy is common but can be overcome. Control can be released and power to live one's own life, is exhilarating. We can share in the lives of other people without overshadowing them. Stepping too far leaves us beyond the gate. Sharing within bounds allows us inspirational moments of time to add to our cherished memory banks.

"Real education should educate us out of  self,  into something far finer; into a selflessness which links us with all humanity." Nancy Astor

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